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ISSUE 5.1 WINTER 1995
An electronic survey of
the OSU area MUSIC scene.
Alias: "The Joel Poll"
CONTENTS
THE BANDS ................................ A
SHOWS & EVENTS ........................... B
CLUBS & HANGOUTS ......................... C
THE MUSIC STORES ......................... D
THE MEDIA ................................ E
CRINGE (The Joel Poll) is the first poll taken of LIVE SHOWS list (LS)
subscribers and related Columbus/OSU area newsgroup readers. LS is an e-mail
based calendar of music related shows and events, started in 1990 (Yes, it's
been 5 years!) to promote the OSU Experimental Series. LS now includes most of
the mainstay OSU/Short North area venues. The list currently has a total of
over 100 direct subscribers and an indeterminable number of newsgroup and
redistribution readers. LS is published twice a week and is available via
gcfreenet.arts.music, osu.music, osu.general, osu.events, cmh.general, and
direct e-mail subscription. To subscribe, send e-mail with the Subject:
"subscribe" to: [email protected]
Have fun, Joel Treadway
[email protected] 133 W. 6th Ave.
(614) 421-7589 Columbus, OH 43201
CRINGE: 1) The Columbus "sound" as once described (in
conversation) by local cartoonist Terence Concannon
2) The lo-fi garage and punk answer to grunge.
3) To shrink or recoil in fear.
THE BANDS
Adjibella
*Flash-in-the-pan smooth world pop music
This smooth afro-pop/world music band got a chance to open for the big draw
Mary Adam 12. Subsequently, they got reviewed in a well read local
alternative paper. A month later, the smooth afro-pop started to become too
pop. Too smooth. Too falsely ethnic. And I don't think it was just me.
The audience dwindled, as did Adji's live performances -- but they're still
around. As for my feelings, it was nice for awhile. - Joel
Bad Ass Billy
*Best/only Southern rock spoof band
Take Super Duper and add few long haired wigs and a Southern slant. - Joel
Bassholes
*Overrated lo-fi Roots scum
Pronounce it however ya like, but as a subtle hint, there's no bassist in the
band -- at least not the times I've seen 'em. It consists of a guitarist/
vocalist and a drummer. They do bare-bones roots, blues and rock. If ya can
hear 'em, the lyrics can be pretty cool -- at least in the cover songs.
It's too sloppy, yet familiar for me -- I'd rather do Hairy Patt. - Joel
Biggie Magoo
*Funk Steely Dan/Zappa imitation
A bunch of fairly accomplished musicians. And sure, Steely Dan did some
nice tasteful tunes, but BM reminds me of the funked version of the more
uneventful SD tunes. BM also does some Zappa-ish material, but even
that comes off a bit like repetitious and dry Steely Dan. - Joel
Bop-Du-Fway
*Dr. Suess as beat poetry jazz
Think "Cat in the Hat" read aloud as beat poetry to 50's style jazz.
There's usually a non-standard keyboard/percussion instrument (xylophone,
bells, marimba or something) in the spotlight too. - Joel
Botch
*Most mediocre Steely Dan/Santana rip-offs
Trite, boring Steely/Santana derivatives. It could almost be the "yuppie
High School hippie" incarnation of Super Duper without the humor. - Joel
Brainiac
*Not-quite-HC/Not-quite-pixiesish/Good
Sound like a mixture of Sonic Youth & The Pixies with a little Devo mixed in.
From Dayton, and proud. See them live, and you'll feel the energy. Vocals
are sometimes mixed into a Moog (those great analogue synths). Kinda like a
90's version of old Hardcore Devo (70's). See these guys and you will be
happy. - Josh Hochman
*Schitzo Sonic Youth/Devo
Moog effected vocals, spastic music and movement -- a high energy show.
Definitely a band to be seen and heard. - Joel
Bumble Flea
*Ska with elements of hardcore, metal, reggae, jazz, grind and cartoon music
Last year I predicted BF would open a few minds. I think it's happened --
having grown into one of the biggest draws in town. They boast one of the
best, yet, modest bassists and guitarists in town, a great writing drummer,
a crazy saxist/backing vocalist and an opening for lead vocalist. :-( - Joel
Bush League
*Power rock with southern influences/Best example of inbreeding in a nice way
Made up of Feversmile, Train Meets Truck and Greenhorn members, jokes of
Greenhorn Jr./Trainhorn/Truckhorn/Greentruck run amuck. Evidence of CCR/50's
rock licks lead to a slightly more up beat cousin of the mother bands. - Joel
Clay
*Schitzo garage pop and punk
Influences ranging from Eno and the Police to the Cramps and performance art
-- excluding Bruce Springsteen ;-). A little rough at times, but ya can't be
perfect when yer playing upside down or when yer Fruit of the Looms are on
the grill while yer playin' bottomless. Just a crazy fun time live.
Unfortunately, it looks like another one of my favorites has broken up.
Maybe the CD will come out anyway though. - Joel
Colorblind
*Most in-yer-face ego funk man
I cringe watching the vocalist perform. Ego, hair, concert hall posing and
attitude all too big for most local stages. From what I recall, the drummer
is pretty good, but that's the only real saving grace. - Joel
Dogrocket
*Basic heavy guitar rock
Ya could call it punk, if ya call Green Day punk. I don't generally. I hear
lots of talk about this band, but the Dog don't do much for me. Maybe the
talk's due the ever powerful local record store connection. - Joel
Dirty Billy
*Old Fart Rock and Roll
! - James R Ebright
Earwig
*Sensitive angry alternative rock/deserving more attention
Yeah, I know, what does alternative mean? I guess it means something removed
from pop rock, 50's rock and classic rock. And that sensitive thing can be
scary. Think Elvis Costello/Matthew Sweet/World Party/Crowded House type
stuff -- some pretty good songwriters at times. Now imagine those guys angry
-- making them play through Bernie's sound system could do it. :-) - Joel
Tim Easton
*Solo acoustic folk, country, blues and roots/Best folksy songwriter
If'n ya like the Haynes Boys or Kosher Spears, check out the vocalist (Tim E.
as I like ta call him). The Haynes Boys tunes he does are much MUCH better
in this solo acoustic format. - Joel
Econothugs
*Heavy punk-, grind-, sludge-core/Most tunes with drug & beer references
"AHHHHH! Crank! AHHHHH! Crank!," Econo-lyrics as a description. "Earl of
Washbucket" features a great bass feedback solo. Big draw, big beer
drinkers, big fun/entertainment/silliness/dementia. I may not get in to
beer, drugs or the anthem "Beer Run," but I still like these guys. - Joel
Ekoostik Hookah
*Biggest draw alternative/Original psychedelic rock band
The Dead was an early influence on at least some of the Hookahs -- maybe to
the extent that they got tired of it. Maybe that's why they now deny the
Dead sounding stigma. Admittedly, I ain't seen EH perform in quite awhile,
but I thought they had some pretty good songs back then. - Joel
Enivob Nez
*Dr. John-ish experimental avantjazz groove
Years ago this was a highly experimental (almost noise) band with a number of
rotating members and few "regular" members. Then the band disappeared for a
long while. EN then returned with a regular line-up and less experimental
sound, ala more popular Dr. John. They still don't play often, so don't pass
up any chance ya get to see 'em. Oh, the name's Zen Bovine backwards. - Joel
Eric's Mother
*Scariest band/Black Butthole Sabbath Surfers
A tall disturbed-looking fire breathing effected voice, acid trip guitar
meanderings; satanic ritual bass lines and tribal time-changing drums. So EM
may have actually been the worst band in Columbus when it started. So a
lot of people considered them Butthole Surfers clones. The band eventually
solidified and developed a following. And of the clone status ... So what,
no one else in town was doing what they did, so it was a nice, err, a scary
change of pace. Oh, and I've heard rumors of a reunion of sorts. - Joel
The Evolution Control Committee
*Experimental/performance art/geek rock?
My attempt at a balanced self-review follows: It's been a long time -- 7
years, in fact -- and The Committee keeps churning out the weird stuff.
Usually compared to Negativland or They Might Be Giants, The Committee
doesn't do a lot of live performances but is relatively well-known on the
Internet and in home-taper circles. One of the few bands that focuses on
making each performance a multi-media event. - Mark G.
*Electronic/experimental sarcasm
ECC has always been a committee of one, no matter what you may have heard,
read or seen -- that's part of the shtick. Basically ECC has created a
series of individual electronic concept pieces that don't make it to stage
often (it can be odd seeing these types of multimedia performances at the
generally rock/punk oriented clubs around town anyway), but tapes abound.
Sarcasm, anti establishmentarianism (whew!), musical trends, and general fun
poking are almost always involved. - Joel
Feversmile
*Power ballad/Pearl Jamish/Previously the most Lantern coverage
Well, it covered "White Room" by Cream too. Eventually, while hanging with
the Greenhorn lot, a country side started to reveal itself. Then it
expanded and became Train Meets Truck. Though it seems Feversmile is gone,
it just released a CD -- their fans are fairly loyal. - Joel
Gasohol
*Grindcore
Ya know, these guys write a pretty good slow sludgecore song. While the
instrument holding members aren't that animated (not uncommon), the vocalist
is literally climbing the walls and hanging from the ceiling. I just wonder
why they keep stopping and starting the same tune for 45 minutes. Still
it's become one of the biggest/newest draws in town. - Joel
Gaunt
*Punk pop noise
Many think of these guys as a punk band or the slower poppier brother of the
New Bomb Turks. But I like to call lead singer/guitarist Jerry "Jerky" Wick
Jerry Manilow. It's really just a noisy garagy pop band with a lot of
frustration, anger and cynicism. - Joel
Girly Machine
*Heavy
Why is it so many of my favorites don't play out often -- or, in the worst
case scenario, break up. GM is still around from what I know, but the guys
are in transition and/or busy most of the time. They released a great, if
not slightly overproduced-in-places, CD recently. All the Girlymen are
competent musicians -- Pixies/Metallica/Trower/Van Halen guitar; slightly
ominous groove bass; powerful drums & edgy true British accent vocals come to
mind. Oh, and intelligent lyrics -- if I'm capable of judging that. - Joel
Gorilla Monsoon
*Sludgecore
Gasohol Jr. without the acrobatic vocalist. - Joel
Greenhorn
*Loud Ballads/Youngish/REO-ish/Midwest rock
Going, going, gone. After a long search for another drummer, the bassist
quit too. One of the biggest bands in town -- both popularity and sound wise
-- was no more. They were to be the next big thing after the New Bomb Turks.
I wasn't a big fan, but I went to the shows and had fun. It wasn't quite
mosh music, but boys will be boys -- if not complete violent idiots. - Joel
Gunshy Ministers
*WesterRock/Replacent/One of the most overrated acts of recent years
I guess if ya like hearing the punkish rock that is the Replacement's claim
to fame, you'd probably enjoy this band. I mean they write good songs, but
don't ya get tired of hearing the same sound and basic structure over and
over again? I'd almost rather listen to Michael Stanley. - Joel
Gut Piston
*Punk rock
The basic rock of early punk. Don't mention Generation X era Billy Idol to
the vocalist -- it's already readily apparent. A little punkier Social D.
can be picked out too ... if only I liked Social D. or Gen. X. - Joel
The Hairy Patt Band
*Devil-at-a-gospel-hoedown folk/Best scary scum folk
Clanking drums, cymbals, pots and pans; raw distorted acoustic guitar; one
hoarse voiced screamer; one laid back lonesome falsetto/low drunk speaker
and story songs about drugs and twisted sex. It's scary fun and possibly my
favorite local band still around. Rated NC-17. - Joel
Hangboxers
*Mellow alternative guitar pop
Just when ya thought these guys were forgotten, they reform. Just think
recent Toad the Wet Sprocket, The BoDeans or even Tom Cochran (yep, the guy
from Red Rider). - Joel
Hard Black Thing (HBT)
*Drunkest unpracticed, rotating member conglomeration
Often featuring Sammy (the famous 70's era Rod-Stewart-looking guy that
hangs out around OSU/High Street), HBT sometimes passes as a highly
experimental avant noise band ... sometimes. Most people don't stay because
they particularly like the band, but more for the spectacle of the unexpected
and unrehearsed performance. Sammy's gravely voice is very intriguing, and
the trumpet playing adds a little more dimension, but ... Aw, maybe I should
just get wasted and join 'em on stage ... - Joel
Haynes Boys
*Rootsy rock
Many of those great Tim Easton songs played with an electric guitar, bass
and drum band. If yer gonna use power, rock it a bit more boys. HB just
falls short on what are, in more acoustic formats, great songs. - Joel
Honk, Wail and Moan
*Best loose jazz in town
They like to do the astral jazz Sun Ra type stuff -- and it's pretty cool if
it doesn't go too long and mellow. Some great originals - especially
trombonist Brian Casey's tunes. The audience isn't always high on the
priority list, but it's not like HW&M ain't entertaining anyway. - Joel
Hotsink
*Alternative pop
I kinda hoped one of the guys would submit they're own review. Maybe if I
blast the band, one of them will next time. Just some alternative pop band.
It can be a bit heavy, but still fairly easy to digest. A lot of melody, but
not to a particularly cheesy or annoying extent. - Joel
Howlin' Maggie
*Soul & funk rock via T. Rex, Bowie and 80's Stones.
When Happy left RC Mob last year, HM was already practicing. With a few
personnel changes, the band's gaining a big following. Happy is a born
front man/guitarist/vocalist as long as he doesn't get too self-conscious.
He does a great Mic Jagger/Stones disco era falsetto and some deeper Wolfman
growls. There's a big repressed cheese factor here -- mainly in the lead
guitarist -- but as long as it's kept in check, I'll rave about 'em. - Joel
Ishkabible
*Primus-like alternative funkish rock
Great musicians for the most part, but just stop that guy from popping the
bass so much. It hurts my sensitive ears. Some of the guitar work and sounds
are pretty unique too, but then the bass starts up again. - Joel
King of Iowa
*Alternative pop
A year or two ago, I slammed these guys. Since then they have "broken up"
and reformed. I haven't seen the new model, for fear of the old annoying
cringe of cheesy songs and stage presence. - Joel
The Kosher Spears
*Best folk/acoustic group
Before the first set is over, the place usually turns into a regular hoedown
hootenanny. The line-up can vary, but the two mainstays are Tim Easton
(guitar/vocals) and Joe Ciriello (washboard/moroccos/snare/backing vocals).
KS is commonly joined by jazzman Derek DiCenzo (upright bass), violin,
backing electric guitar and even the occasional banjo. - Joel
Lollipop Factory
*Queen meets Herman's Hermits quirk pop
Lots of Queen-isms with British 60's quirk pop thrown in (not that those
differ much). If you've ever heard of the group Rabbit, ya know what to
expect. I can't say I'm a big fan, but LP is a bit of a guilty pleasure for
me. I feel I should hate it, but I don't. Maybe it's the total cheese
effect of the costumes, stage decorations and the aging teen-idols-in-a-rock
band image. Plus, they pull it off pretty well. - Joel
Lord Burger
*Lousy 70's/Kiss influenced hard rock
These guys like me because I've done sound for 'em really cheap and at the
last minute. I thought they sucked -- then they got a little tighter.
They're really just lousy Kiss-style rock with Martyr Colony screamer Arturo
on lead scream. I never got into Kiss -- except maybe the Elder album nobody
ever hears about. Look for lots of hair and attitude. - Joel
Los Clementes
*Most unintentional Dead sounding band
LC featured Stache's owner, Dan Dougan on acoustic guitar and lead vocals.
Sorry Dan, but with elements of roots rock, country and a that lazy feel, LC
came off as a uninspired Dead band. I'm kinda glad they're, um, dead. - Joel
Madrugada
*Stuffy jazz attack
Great musicians and teachers, but they seem kinda bored. - Joel
Donna Mogavero Band
*Most overrated folk/Adult Alternative rock band
Blah. Some folksy woman fronting a "rock" band that covers too much middle
of the road bland rock material to be passed off as anything overly exciting.
They do have a big following in the Short North bar scene though. - Joel
Magnificent Souls
*Newest big rock thing on the rise
From the debris of Greenhorn rises another basic Midwest rock band -- led by
ex-Greenie Mark Spurgeon on guitar and vocals. This time there's less focus
on the country/ballad side and more emphasis on the straight ahead basic
rock. The vocals could use some work in places, but all the makings of next
big thing status are there. - Joel
Martyr Colony
*Skinny Puppy, Columbus style
A recent reorganization of personnel has left them a member short, but
they're still going. Columbus' own Puppy-style industrial band cranks out the
dark pop, with distorted vocals from Artie and keyboards by Jeff "I can play
better than you with one hand tied behind my back!" Muth. Forget Nevermor;
they were wash-ups before they started. Martyr Colony are the only ones doing
this here, and they're even good at it to boot! - Mark G.
*Uneasy industrial macabre/Skinny Puppy-ish/Most unrelaxing
Electronic noise, samples and music, some distorted guitar occasionally,
guitar distortion/rat pedal screaming and multimedia presentation -- I wanna
like 'em. They're different fer around here. I'm even told MC's good, but I
guess it just ain't my cup-of-tea ... and it is just tea for two now. - Joel
Mary Adam 12
*Slofunk/Best local pop song
A mixture of 70's style funk, jazz and Tower of Powerish horns. This ain't
that Chili Peppers head bangin' in-your-face funk. Such a large crowd now
that they've only done double-night bills at Stache's recently. Always a lot
of dancing. MA12's new (and only) CD features the more laid back tunes and
"Gone Again" -- possibly the best pop song by a local band. Unfortunately,
two of my other live favorites are not on the CD. :-( - Joel
Melodious Thunk
*Tasty sax jazz
I think the band has been through a few changes since I last saw them, but
MT was an upright bass, drum and sax trio. Some really nice melodic sax
led jazz with just slightly rough-edged, yet tasteful, improvs. - Joel
Men of Leisure
*R&B
MoL is about as close as a band can get to becoming an institution. The
regular lead vocalist seems to be missing, but that's O.K. This means the
other band members trade vocals providing a little more variety. That means
a lot for a band that plays so often. On a good night the guitarist is one
of the hottest in town. They've been workin' "Brick House," "These Shoes Were
Made for Walking," "One Way Out" (featuring Hookah Steve Sweeney) and some
accordion in quite often recently. - Joel
Miss May '66
*Grindcore Hole
First there was 26 Foot Honey. A member later Miss May was formed. A few
members after that only one Honey is left AND there's a guy, a Thug, in the
group. They gained a lot of popularity, probably from a combination of
things ... In short, MM66 was (is) a heavy (nearly) all-girl band with
numerous connections to the arts/music/club scene in Columbus and a lot of
aspirations. Rumor is another male has taken on the bass role now. - Joel
Monster Truck 005 (MT5)
*ERRRRR!
4 guys making guitar punk noise and screams living up to the name. My
favorite parts are when the bass and drum groove start making their way from
underneath the rumbling wall off noise and sheer possessed screams. MT5 is
back, and this time I like 'em. - Joel
Moviola
*Trippy garage pop/Velvet Pavement
Possibly the only band I offered to play with after only seeing 'em once -- I
liked the faltering, quivering sound. It went through a few sketchy changes,
but sounds like it's coming into it's own again -- with a second guitarist, a
new bassist and all four guys singing a bit. I still prefer the original
bassist's more competent melodic playing. O.K. so I don't personally like
the "new" bassist -- he looks awkward on stage anyway. Oh, every member is
heavily involved with Moo too. Maybe it should be MOOviola. - Joel
Moody Jackson
*Best band I'm in:
Moody Jackson rules. I saw them a couple of times and they fit any category
that you can think of -- from blues to punk to everything in between. Hey,
they have even done a couple of country songs. - sweaty pat
*Punk
Just some punk trio. - Joel
Mr. tORNaDo heAd:
*Best unsigned bound-to-be-a-big-star-someday category:
Yes, this is shameless blatant self promotion. What did you expect? But if
intrigued, please email me and I'll send ya a tape. - JD Kimple
My Mother's Creation
*College-rock-gone-pop trend of the 90's
Yep, a little Vedder, a little Cobain, a lot of bigger-than-life arena
posing, but not much real originality or excitement. - Joel
The New Bomb Turks
*Speed punk rock
I tag that rock on the end to hint at the traditional rock and original punk
stylings. I've said it before, and it still holds ... The Turks aren't
really a punk band -- they have a lot more in common with the Stones and
AC/DC. They just play it fast enough and loud enough that we're fooled into
calling it punk. Oh, can't forget the success of their recent releases,
European tour and a video on MTV!! - Joel
The New Duncan Imperials
*Best out of town band to play Stache's
If you haven't seen them live, sacrifice your dearest pet and do so next time
they're in town. These guys put on the best damn most fun rock and roll show
I've seen in a long time. What other band interrupts it's songs so the
drummer can run out and pass little plastic animals to EVERY audience member,
then continues the show? - JD Kimple
Nude
*Double drum & guitar progressive rock
The music is pretty heavy and atmospheric with two drummers and two effected
guitarists. All of 'em are technically great musicians. Nods to the
Talking Heads, Adrian Belew and Eno should be made -- especially the vocal
delivery. Nude may be a bit pretentious/70's art-rockish influenced for the
punk at heart -- I kinda like that though. - Joel
Ouchcube
*Metallica with a soar throat
The 'cube is known in the campus scene mainly because of its cut on the
Eardrop CD. It does a good Metallica, though the vocals are a bit monotone
in the strained raspy sense. - Joel
Parsnip
*Heavy alternative Addicts
One of the first things that came to mind was a young, musically ambitious
Jane's Addiction still working out the kinks. They ain't bad musicians; and
the experimental guitar plinking with lots of dynamics is cool too. - Joel
pet UFO
*Driving heavy edged guitar rock/Most searing vocals
Sou's lead vocals could (forgive me if this has been said -- it just fits)
strip paint off warships. The music has Gothic and Metallica qualities, but
is much too driving to be Goth and too punkish to be metal. PUFO has many
singles and CDs (including its own) on its Burnt Sienna label. - Joel
Willie Phoenix
*Basic rocker searching for a second prime
Over ten years ago this guy (and whatever the incarnation of his band was
then) had a deal with Atlantic Records. I think it lasted one album -- but
"Kiss Quick, Good Night" was a pretty cool tune that got a bit of air play
locally. Ever since then, he seems to be trying to reach for the same star,
but the freshness seems to have gone -- a freshness that has not been
regained through multiple band and personnel changes. - Joel
Pica Huss
*Best heavy local band/Band that should have made it & wish were still around
So Pica Huss, the man and the band, isn't with us anymore. I know I'm not
alone in thinking PH should have been the big thing. Comparisons to early
Chili Peppers have been made -- don't forget the covers of Alice Copper and
the Beatles' "I Want You (She's So Heavy)" or the basic punk tunes. The
show, due to the vocalist & the music, was a wild, crazy, near performance
art event most of the time; and lots of people danced -- everywhere. Simply
the most fun I've had with any band consistently. - Joel
Poets of Heresy
*Phunky Phat RAP, Babeee
FUNK all those bullshit MC's, G -- Da Po-ets uv Hair-Uh-C slam it to ya hard
'n' real! Sometimes I liked 'em better without the live band, but the guitar,
bass, drum, and turntable combo make for a pretty thick, live, and hard
sound. The rhymes are smooth and sharp, and they've got it all down. Do
yourself a fave and check out Columbus' best boyz on da mic! - Mark G.
*Only hip hop (with band) in town
Yep, and I ain't even a big hip hop fan. PoH is 3 great rappers, a DJ/
rapper, real drums, real guitar and real bass. The band has been through
some transition guitar/drum wise, but seems to have finally jelled into a
fairly consistent good live show. And it does some perty cool island
influenced stuff now too. - Joel
Preston Furman
*Fun young garagy rock band
With the addition of another guitarist, PF added that Midwest country rock
sound to its punk-rock-garage rants. Not always on the mark or special, but
enough so to keep my ears open. - Joel
Pretty Mighty Mighty
*Heavy alternative ethereal rock
What sticks out in PMM live is the crazy pied piper like violinist. Then
there's the duel vocalists (male and female) and pretty yet noisy guitar.
At times I hear My Bloody Valentine (especially on the CD & singles), other
times I hear early heavy REM doing more progressive rock sounding stuff.
PMM even does a great cover of Earwig's "Dinosaur Song." I recommend the
live show over the fine but samey sounding CD . - Joel
Quixotics
*Rock sound with folk/blues influence/Good live show with humorous overtones
This band is new to the Columbus music scene. They have a definite rock
sound, but you can hear a folk and blues influence as well. The band could
be likened to Pink Floyd and Jethro Tull, but Midnight Oil would also be
close. Quixotics is entertaining to watch, as well as listen to, thanks to
the on stage antics of lead singer Fred Swan. The band structure includes
the basic drums, bass, and lead guitar, but Quixotics also brings along a
keyboard to give them a fuller sound and an acoustic guitar that adds a
certain folksiness. I've seen them twice, both times headlining at Ruby
Tuesdays, and the songs 'Young Turk Joe', 'Darkhorse', and 'Rock Star' seem
to be crowd favorites. - Aaron "Wonko" Albert
Rhymocerous
*Avant rock hip hop silliness
Experimental fusion/avant jazz/funk/hip hop played by two great young
guitarists -- the bassist and drummers are no slouches either. The
vocalists/front "men" usually dress, act and sing outrageously. They used to
scream and rap nearly everything but, probably with a little persistence on
the band's and the fans' behalfs, they started taking the singing a bit more
seriously -- at least on the more ballad-like numbers. - Joel
Roller Girl:
*Best woodie award for local talent:
She was opening up ... caressed my check and looked into my eyes for a
fleeting moment. Yes, she did it to quite a few people...SO WHAT? Yeah,
it's part of the act, but what the hell? She's cute, too. - JD Kimple
*Cheesy 70's United Skates of America party throw-back
Some woman skating around clubs with air (inflatable) guitars, sparklers,
sing-a-longs and taped music. Pretty goofy. - Joel
Royal Crescent Mob (R.C. Mob)
*Funk rock/Dead big name
Shortly after I predicted they wouldn't be touring, Happy quit. The rest of
the Mob tried to paste it together with another bassist, but that didn't
last. Possibly Columbus' biggest claim to alternative rock fame is gone.
Well, we still have Scrawl and the Turks. - Joel
Rustic Bucket
*Power Jam rock
A lot of full sounding open chords and a mixture of heavy Midwest rock and
grunge -- not that those styles differ a whole heck of a lot. They also
throw in a guitar version of "Suicide is Painless" (the Theme to M.A.S.H.)
on occasion. Not bad, just not too special most of the time. - Joel
Science Gravy Orchestra (Paul Brown's)
*Avantjazz
I would put Paul's name first, but he gets enough ego boosting from his id.
Even though I don't like what I know of the guy, he is a great guitarist. He
even got an amateur guitarist of the year award from some big music magazine
a few years back -- oh, and a Chili Peppers audition. SGO used to have an
incredible violinist that usually upstaged even Paul. I miss those days.
Then again, I didn't like what I knew of the violinist either. - Joel
Scrawl
*Garage pop/Biggest living local band
I didn't really learn to appreciate Scrawl until I got depressed at Larry's
one night and they came through the jukebox. I still don't get into the
older stuff, but the last album has some really strong material. - Joel
SHAG
*P-funk
... They are a P-funk Bootsy Collins type band and they are even going to
record a CD with the man himself. These guys kick ass. They have a horn and
sax section, percussion and dress up in the funkiest outfits around! They'll
be back ... so everyone check them out! - John P. Romeo
Soulfinger
*Hottest new soul/Slofunk band/Biggest frizzy hair award
So Jeff McCargish of longtime Columbus R&B band, the Columbus Jets, has a
soul band now. They do some pretty cool disco too. "Disco Inferno" and
"Superstition" are highlights, along with a number of other tunes that keep
the audience dancing. Oh, the other guitarist/dancer/ex-circus guy gets the
big frizzy award -- I would've won if I hadn't cut my mop last year. - Joel
Super Duper
*Silliest & funniest mellow 70's style takeoffs and spoofs.
To paraphrase the Super Duper theme song, "We're Super Duper/Gonna ram it
up your pooper/and show you what it's all about." Imagine that sung to the
tune of a Carpenters tune ... any Carpenters tune. - Joel
The Susans
*Sheltered alternative
I'm sorry, but the minute it covered the Cranberries' "Zombie," the Susans
lost any ounce of interest I had in them. Is there no escaping that song!?
It is rather standard classic-rock-influenced takes on what they seem to
consider alternative music. I guess it's O.K., but who really cares --
especially if ya fill yer set with a bunch of similarly styled covers. - Joel
Tenderfoot
*12 string acoustic/Native American flute stuff
A fairly new and out of the ordinary band. The guitar is fairly standard
perty passing chord 12 string bedroom practicing fare. The wooden flute is
even less eventful. Maybe if the songs and sets were shorter, I wouldn't get
so mellow ... bored or disinterested. - Joel
Thomas Jefferson Slave Apartments
*Punkish heavy rock
Mr. Ron House is back -- and on a regular basis. So I didn't used to like
him or his music much. I'll assume marriage has changed him -- I'm too
stubborn to think I have. :-) TJSA has been around off and on for a few
years and, though I always liked the guitar work, nothing else did much for
me until recently. Ron's acting like a little punk rock kid again, the new
drummer and bassist seem to have a lot better grasp of the music and the
songs are gettin real good. - Joel
Train Meets Truck
*Country tinged power rock/Band with most (nearly quarterly) Lantern coverage
Out of the dust of the Pearl Jamish Feversmile came TMT with a 2nd guitarist
and a band more up front about it's country leanings. Short lived or did
they just stop playing around town? The latter seems to be the case. - Joel
Ugly Stick
*60's blue-eyed R&B, country, punk and X influenced rock
Another of my favorites broken up after what? 5 Years? At one time, they
did a lot of X tunes. I hear early Van Morrison (and Them), some country,
punk, 50's rock and even a little Celtic (via Van/Waterboys) and grunge.
US didn't take the music too seriously to keep from having fun or getting
a little loose and sloppy. They also had a couple great full length releases
-- the CD should still be floating around most OSU area record stores. - Joel
Vibralux
* 80's synth pop influenced by 60s and 70's keyboard bands
Someone mentioned the "Mazzy Star" sound in the context of Vibralux once. I
guess I hear it, but even Mazzy has become a bit too basic yet pretentious,
or pretty yet effects-dependent for my taste. I mean I'm starting to hear
"Nights in White" in Mazzy's "Fade into You." By the same token, I hear the
Moody Blues' "Go Now" in Vibralux's "Hercules" ... or was that the Go Go's or
Nina doing Procol Harem. In any case, they're gone and I have to find a new
band to hate, yet befriend. - Joel
Vinyl
*Peter Gabriel meets Jellyfish/Worst sultry sensitive British accent vocals by
a guy from Columbus?!
It's show time, but the bassist/vocalist is still EQ-ing the drum mics. Over
a half hour late they start with an O.K. sounding percussion piece -- an
attempt at being ethnic that falls short, but we can deal with it. Then some
neato earthy synth starts in -- kinda Gabrielesque. O.K. The music's fine,
though the bass bothers me a bit -- too smooth and poppy. Finally, the
vocals ... Cringe. I'm gone. - Joel
Watershed
*Overrated Midwest rock
Just some basic rock band with John Cougar/Bryan Adams leanings. Yech. But,
hey, they're signed and draw big crowds (so I'm told). - Joel
Yips
*Muddy garage noise guitar-drum duo
The drummer tends toward two extremes: Not playing and kill the drums. I
think I'd like the Yips much more if he had a more continuous dynamic range.
The guitarist/vocalist, Gilmore Tamney, is known for her zine prose, but here
the vocals are too commonly muddy or mumbled to be heard over the abused
drums or her noisily distorted guitar. - Joel
Young Ghost
*Acoustic duo REManiac
If Michael Stipe played guitar with Natalie Merchant in the '60, it might
sound like this. I have a certain fondness for both, but this format gets
boring and bland pretty quick - not that Natalie or the Maniacs were ever
that exciting in their own time. - Joel
Dawn Yount
*Best vocal performance by a butt-drunk fool at the Distillery
I nominate myself. I also nominate Steph for the same category. And since
you run this show, I vote we both win. What do ya say? - Dawn Yount
*Some screaming drunk fool relatively new to the Live Shows list.
Same goes fer ripsnortin' co-nominee Steph. - Joel
Yumbambe
*Most talented yet cheesy latino jazz band
Some of the best (and teachers of the best) musicians around, but it's a bit
like processed cheese with overly reconstituted dehydrated peppers. - Joel
Miscellaneous
*Coolest Local bands other than mr. tORNaDo heAd:
New Bomb Turks, Poets of Heresy, Okra All Stars. And long live Pica Huss.
- JD Kimple
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